Beside You

I dream for weeks of these long nights, when I sleep beside you.

But tell me, my love: am I a shadow that you keep beside you?

I trace your footsteps through forests, down old cobbled streets:

Echoing the rustle of old women’s skirts, I sweep beside you.

Once you trace dark constellations, they’re all I can see in the sky.

If you leapt to fly towards these stars, would I leap beside you?

I’ve seen your summer pied piping, the intoxications you cause

Your powerful words gathering a flock of sheep beside you.

These thoughts press on my head, like the weight of the sea.

A small ocean of bitterness: I’m immersed deep beside you.

Pressure becomes silence. But I think so loud, you must know:

I lie still in the night, longing for you to hear me weep beside you.

Forgive me, my love. I envy your straight back, your clear strength.

Only a coward would ask you to carry these fears I heap beside you.

Your presence can crack, a light streaking down from the clouds –

But me, so earthbound and small; it’s only Lydia who creeps beside you.